Amidst a Season of Singleness

      In a world filled with romance, true love and fairy tales, it does not take much for someone who is single to become lonely, yearning for fleshly desires and feeling the need to be in a relationship. Movies and books proclaim that getting married is the ultimate goal for our lives. Of course, marriage is a milestone that we all should be striving for, but many of us never once stop to think of what God’s Word might have to say about being single and how this time of our lives can prove to be vital in preparing us for a Godly marriage. Contrary to popular belief, it is such a rewarding gift to be in a season of singleness. On many occasions throughout our Scriptures, the writers of our sacred texts make it clear to their readers that being single is meant to be perceived as an opportunity, not as a problem waiting to be solved. Let’s dive further into what The Bible says about single living and how we can aim to become thankful for our seasons of singleness.

     Firstly, seasons of singleness give us all of the time in the world to focus on one person… Jesus Christ. Our most important relationship will always be with our Lord and Savior. In the New Testament, the Apostle Paul writes in his first letter to the Corinthian church,

I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. (1 Corinthians 7:32-35, ESV)

Children of God, let us understand the truth that a real marriage is not what we all see on television. There are inevitably going to be many times of anxiousness, moments of tension and confusion between spouses. Paul is correct. When two people come together in the Godly covenant of marriage, their focus will naturally become divided as each spouse longs to please the other. Paul is not pronouncing to his readers that marriage is something never to be sought after. He is saying that married couples will spend a great amount of time and energy being devoted to taking care of their family matters.

     What is Paul saying about single living in these verses? Believers in the Lord who are in a season of singleness, you may seek the Lord and His plans for your life through and through, with undivided attention. This is a privilege and tremendous opportunity to let the Lord into every area of your life. Do not worry about earthly matters. Let your focus be on the Lord. Become aware of His movements. Your faith, trust and love for Jesus Christ will grow. Thus, leading to a true believer in the Lord who is equipped and ready for anything that may come their way.

     Secondly, in the Old Testament, the Book of Jeremiah expands upon the life of the major prophet who was called by God to never marry. At the beginning of chapter sixteen of Jeremiah’s book, he writes,

The word of the Lord came to me: “You shall not take a wife, nor shall you have sons or daughters in this place.” (Jeremiah 16:1-2, ESV)

The Lord commanded Jeremiah to remain unmarried and to never have any children. God will call particular people, according to His purposes, to specific do’s and don’ts while on our earthly journey with Him. What does this mean for the single men and women of God in our modern day? The Lord has not forgotten you. He is calling you for a distinct purpose. Listen to His calming voice. Rest in His mighty arms. Lean into Him to seek, find and fulfill what Christ is calling you to do.

     This process of seeking the Lord’s will for our lives while we are amidst a season of singleness is not meant to harden our hearts, it is meant to transform them. As we wait for the Father to bless us with His direction, our focus begins to shift. We no longer seek to fulfill our own fleshly desires and earthly wants. Slowly, but surely, we become enamored with what Jesus Christ desires for our lives. This spiritual procedure consists of waiting on the Lord and genuinely surrendering to His will over and over again. This is directly intended to heighten our dependence on Christ Jesus. Passionately pursue the Lord with all of our heart, soul, mind and strength. Answers will come in due time. God’s timing is nothing like our own.

     Thirdly, be content, no matter the situation and no matter the circumstances. In his writing to the church at Philippi, the first church that the Apostle Paul founded in Europe, he remarks,

Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:11-13, ESV)

Why are these verses significant to believers in the Lord who may be in a season of singleness? Becoming content in this life for many of us is a learned skill. We learn how to be content by letting His Word nourish us and relying solely on the tools that the Lord has already gifted us. For the single children of God, this is a crucial piece to the season of singleness puzzle.

     To the beloved ones experiencing a season of singleness, do not lay low and do not fall into the snare of losing yourself to worldly emotions of life, wishing that your circumstances were different. Do not ask God, “Why am I still single?” Instead, ask Him, “How may I glorify you during this time of singleness?” and, “What areas of my life are you trying to improve during this time of living single?” These questions, asked from a pure, passionate and sincere heart, make it clear to the Lord that you are actively pursuing His will. From there you will begin to let the Holy Spirit take over every aspect of your life. Let Jesus Christ into every uncharted, deep cave of your soul and He will transform you from the inside out. Let Him into every crevasse, every crack. He will save you and by doing so, restoring all that has been broken. Become comfortable with the uncomfortable and surrender to the spiritual exercise of restoration.

     Children of the Lord, a season of singleness is not meant to be a punishment. Nor is it meant to be looked down upon. It is meant to be an opportunity. A chance to grow through Jesus Christ with undivided attention. A chance to listen to the Lord’s calling upon your life. A chance to become grateful for everything that you do have, rather than pondering about what you may not have. The Lord will always provide. He rewards those who seek Him with honesty, genuineness and compassion. Stay sober-minded. Rest and be calm. Live in His victory. Your season of singleness might just be preparing you for something, or someone… Wait on the Lord. Let the Father make your paths straight. All will be well in due time.